I am learning every day that we have to live by faith, not by feelings. I haven't been leaning on or trusting God. I have been walking in my flesh (trying to do things alone) struggling through the financial burden of G. P.S. (the bracelet). At times, it seems so hopeless. I just moved into a one bedroom apartment in July and, financially, I'm not doing so good. (Christ The Servant Church and St. Vincent dePaul are helping me with food, gas and incidentals).
I have to remember that God's word says, "He doesn't give us more than we can handle and he always makes a way out from temptation." So I am standing on his word and promises.
I struggle with wanting to go back to old behaviors by getting financial help from men (my old life of prostitution), because I am overwhelmed with G. P. S. fees, back child-support, fines and just the bills of life. Granted, I got myself into this mess with the drunk driving and I believe I should have consequences, but I wish the system was geared more to help us and not set us up for failure. Then there wouldn't be so many of us going back and doing the same old things and landing back in the same old jails and institutions. It's just a vicious cycle. Thank God for giving me the strength to stand firm and not give up.
I have successfully completed intensive outpatient treatment this past week and, in September, I will have completed over 5 years of probation. I'm still on G.P.S. until February 9, 2011, but with the help of letters from counselors and my probation officer, I am going to write the court to request a sentence reduction.
The financial burden of G.P.S. is overwhelming and I want so bad to be a self-supporting, productive person in society. I have come so far. . . I just want to move on and give back to others.
I am so grateful for the St. Vincent dePaul ministries, Christ the Servant Lutheran Church, Linda Pischke, Jean DeLisle, and other 'anonymous' supporters for all their help. Your encouragement and prayers keep me going.
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A NOTE FROM LINDA:
Joy is an inspiration to me. Whenever she encounters disappointment, financial problems, or difficulties, she prays, sings hymns, and praises God. She is a dedicated worker with an awesome attitude. I would like to ask our readers to hold her up in prayer this week. Employment is difficult for an ex-offender. People want to judge her because of her past. Thank You.
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